Dark Chao Role-Playing Game Mission 15: Return of the Government!

[cut to the chao in Los Angeles]
SB: Why are we in LA, again?
Shade: I hear Ryan Drummond is somewhere in this city.
Dark: I thought he was in--
Shade: HE'S IN THIS CITY.
[a man in a business suit notices Shade]
[Shade notices the man, as well]
[the man walks around a building, quietly]
[Shade checks around the building, and no one is there]
Solar: Sir, what's wrong?
Shade: ....thought I saw the G-Man. Doesn't matter. The REAL reason we're here is to kill the folks at Bungie for making such a horrible platformer.
Ade: Okay, first of all, that's a STUPID reason to be here. Second, Halo is a first-person shooter. Third, Bungie's headquarters are in Washington, not California.
Shade: It's an FPS? ....oh.
[suddenly, they're ambushed and knocked out!]
[they wake up in a quiet jail cell]
[the word, "GUN" is on the wall]
Solar: GUN kidnapped us?
AChao: I'm sure they had a good reason to...
Shade: Yeah-- we make good Chao Sandwiches! Let's get outta here!

YOUR MISSION-- Break out of this room. Somehow. I don't care how, just get out of that room.


Ade: No worries, sir, I'll break it! *punches it and breaks it*---wait, no--- *punches the wall and gets his hand hurt* Ade: OW, OW, OW, MY LITTLE HAND.


solar:LEAVE THIS TO ME. *bites through the bars,and SWALLOWS THEM.* 


Every Chao goes out, but then an a guard stands up in front of them.

Guard: How did you escape? Duh, I'll put you there again.

All the Chao are on jail cell again. But now an a G.U.N guard is on a chair, watching them...

S.Bonic: *quietly* Guys, I've got an a idea, what about if we make an a little Chao song for make him sleep?
Dark: It'll be a pleasure!
There has always been a dividing line
But you choose, you choose, yes you choose not to see it
And then you wonder why you fall
It cuts through the heart of every city
If you climb to the top of the highest building
You can see where it falls 'cause the streetlights stop
The colours start to change
You hear a voice inside you
Not the words that you wanted to hear
Not the things that you wanted to see hey, hey, hey, hey

In the comfort and safety of your own home
Remember those outside in the cold
And the wind and the rain
And take in your hands a little ray of light
And turn it into a beam that pierces the darkness of the night

There has always been a dividing line
But you choose, you choose, yes you choose not to see it
Sometimes we believe if we close our eyes
The rain might wash it away
That's why we stumble and we fall
Not the words that you wanted to hear
Not the things that you wanted to see hey, hey, hey, hey

When everything that you hold dear to you
Has finally faded away from your life
The last cold ray of sunshine slowly disappears
Round the corner of the building
And leaves you alone
When darkness covers--
Shade: *punches Dark* Oh, shut up.



SB: It's all about the thought
AC: Maybe if we just snap their necks
SB: You mean like SOLID SNAKE?!
AC: ... Yes Shadow Bonic, just like Solid Snake
Sonic: ooh Fun!
Silver: Let's get a crackin'
Shadow: Or a Snappin'
Flame: Or a shut upin' and doing it already.
-AC Snaps the guard's neck-
AC: Quick guys, steal the keys and get us out of here before the guards come!
SB: What does GUN want with us anyways?
Silver: It doesn't matter right now!
Sonic: Solar, I want you to bight the chain off the Keys...
Shadow: And Ade, I want you to use the keys to get us out of here!
Shade: HEY! that's my job!
Shadow: Who cares, Just do it! 


[Shade punches the others; they wake up; they're out in the hallway]
Shade: Remember? Solar ate the bars? Sheesh, you and your fantasies.
[they run around, and find a huge, empty room]
[the door behind them closes and locks]
[a giant GUN robot appears]
GUN Robo: I am Stinkoman 20X6-- I mean, I am Big Foot. From Sonic Adventure 2. You chao will never beat me.

Or.... WILL you?


SB: This is the Time for the Bouncy Ball Technique from Sonic adventure 2!
Sonic: Wait, who's the- AUGH!
Silver: Well that was well solved
GUN Robo: how is a bouncy Chao going to hurt me?
-GUN Robo Loses half his health-
GUN Robo: Well that was unexpected...
Sonic: Please, no more
SB:The sooner we finish this, the less pain you'll be in!
Silver: Well, here we go again
-Sonic goes BOING-
Shadow: I am so video taping this and putting this on Youtube!
Sonic: Hey don't -boing- Mock -Boing- Me!
GUN Robo: Oh snap, here it comes >.<
-GUN robo dies for some odd reason because a Bouncy Chao hit him?-
AC: Hey Guys
All: What?
AC: how did that make any sense?
All: We don't care, it just did!
AC: Whatever... 


["NICE!!!" appears on-screen]
[suddenly, the Master Chief appears]
[Shade sighs, looks at him, and he wets his pants and runs away]
Shade: What? I don't like Halo.
Dark: But it's a good game! And sequel!
Shade: ...I meant Halo 3. And that was the Halo 3 model of him.
Dark: Oh. Good point.
[note: These aren't EXACTLY my points of view. These are more... exaggerated forms of my opinions.]
[SUDDENLY.... the BIOLIZARD (from SA2) appears and roars!]

WHAT WILL YOU DO?! 


solar:whistles* perfect chaos(i beat the game and chaos is the guardian of Chao) appears and holds the biolizard in place while solar jumps up,finds a game cube controller slot,inserts a game cube controller in it and now has complete control over it.
solar:sweet. makes the biolizard pick up the others,put them behind solar,and busts its way out. 


-You hear Live and Learn-
Sonic: We've got to defeat him
Shadow: His weak spot is the red swelling area, Aim for it

SB: Oh yeah!!!
-Guitar Solo-
SB: But you can't help but follow!
Silver: And put you right back where you ca-aaaaame
SB: Whoa Whoa Whoa! OH YEAAAH!!!
-Guitar Solo-

Shadow: Chaos Spear!
Sonic: Shadow, you need rest, let me give it a try!
-Sonic Attacks the Red swelling area-
Shadow: It's time we finish this, Chaos Spear!
-The Bio-hazard is falling straight down to earth-
Sonic: Shadow, you know what to do
Shadow: Affirmative!
Sonic and Shadow: CHAOS CONTROL!!!
-Sonic, shadow, and the Bio hazard are now in a different part of Space-
Sonic: Shadow, let's go back into the ark!
Shadow: I hear you Sonic!
-they get back into the Ark-
SB: So, how'd it go?
Shadow: Good, good...
Sonic: WE DID EXCELLENT! 


solar:YOU MORON I WAS ON THAT THING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
sonic:uh-oh.
solar:*hopping mad.*(btw solar is a chaos chao,a devil type.)never do that again. EVER.
sonic:oops. 


[a powerful, deep, booming voice is heard]
?: Excellent. You have defeated the Sonic Adventure 2 representations of our mighty armada. But... can you beat the final enemy? Presenting...... GLaDOS!
[a robot hangs from the ceiling; green gas slowly fills the room]
?: Good luck defeating her before that deadly neurotoxin kills you.
[a rocket turret comes out of the ground, and begins firing rockets at you]
?: Oh, and... you cannot defeat her the way people normally do in Portal. You're on your own! 


solar:iil take care of glades with shade. try to stop the neurotoxin and rokets!GO!GO!GO! solar:now to unleash my true power! he starts absorbing soolar energy,and starts to glow before unleashing a blast of solar energy 


sonic: hey dude. i'm diggin the party!
solar: yeah man. go RALPH NADER!
sonic: yeah i like him. he's lonely like me. he doesn't have any friends. he's lame.
sloar: yeah dude. you are pretty lame.
sonic: SHUT THE DUCK UP!
--sonic punches solar in the face--
--they fight for hours--
--they both die--
THE END. 


[GLaDOS is dead]
GLaDOS: This isn't war. It's murder. What did I ever do to you? *shuts down, neurotoxins evaporate magically*
?: Excellent. You have stopped all three of our toughest enemies. Now... can you get out of this room?! MUAHAHAHAAAAAA!!! 


solar whips out random pistol and shoots where the voice is coming out and a figure falls down solar picks up and drags him back to dark garden.
he got out by blasting the wall after all hes a chaos devil chao.


[BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!]
[ROAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRR!!!!]
All: WHAT THE **** WAS THAT?!
Dark: Sorry. I have gas.
Shade: *groan*
?: Excellent. Now, I have one FINAL task for you. Be chargin' ya lazorz, then be firin' ya lazorz. BE SHOOP DA WHOOP.
Shade: O NOEZ! Not even I, the great and epic Shade, can do that! Or even understand what that means!


is it be chargeing your lasers,and fireing your lasers be hyper beam? ?:HOWD U FIGURE IT OUT? solar:dude,dude,dude,though i doubt it would fit in ur head,but.........A PLOT HOLE. and thanks for telling me how to defeat you. EVERYONE FIRE UR LAZERS! keep him distractred for a minite! okay! 1 miniute later:get out of the way! okay all:move aside. revaling solar glowing from the amount of solar energy hes absorbed solar cupped his hands,and shouted:SOLARKAMEHAMEHA!BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BASICILY SOLAR DID A KAMEHAMEHA WITH SOLAR ENERGY. masked figiure falls and lands and underneath it iz................................................ djay continue tis. 


[Shade punches Solar; he wakes up]
Shade: Dude, what is the MATTER with you today? You're always daydreaming!
Solar: Sorry, sir.
Shade: *groan* And, no, it's not a hyper beam. Sheesh. Besides, we did the Shoop Da Whoop, and now we're out of the building.
END MISSION?
?: Muahahahahahahaha.....
[behind them is Metal Sonic, stepping out of the rubble]