DJay32 presents....

A Dark Chao Adventures production....

The Dark Life:

A rockumentary by DJay32

Cut to Dark standing in the Dark Garden, as seen through a camera; there is an interviewer (DJay32) off-screen

DJay32: So, Dark... tell me, what is it like being the first ever Dark chao in the garden?

Dark: Well, um... Jordan... I have to say, um...

DJ: Call me "DJ."

Dark: All right, DJ, uh.... being the first Dark chao used to be kinda lonely, right? But then, see, Shade got hatched in the Neutral Garden, and I wasn't lonely anymore! Now that Shade has made himself an army, things are rather.... good-ish.

DJ: "Good-ish?"

Dark: Yeah. Good-ish. Plural form of the noun, "Good." Look it up in a Darktionary.

DJ: Right. So, I hear you've started your own band.

Dark: Oh, yeah, my band.

Dark steps off-screen for a second, until the camera turns to face him; Dark is rummaging through some bushes; Dark finds something, and pulls it out; it is a blue guitar with the words "Dark Chao Killaz" on it

DJ: It looks good.

Dark looks at the camera for a second, clicks his tongue, and sighs; he continues staring at his guitar

Dark: O'course it looks good; I bought it.

DJ: You bought it? With what money?

Dark: The money I got from my concerts and varying fans.

DJ: I see. What songs can you play?

Dark: Now, you see, THAT is a stupid question. See here, it's not what songs I CAN play, but what songs I WANT to play.

DJ: Ah, I see, I see.... makes sense.

Dark: Actually, I've never played a song for my fans.

There is some awkward silence after the last comment

DJ: Well, what songs would you like to play?

Dark: Eh, you know. The usual. Musical Box. Supper's Ready. Stairway to Heaven. I played His World once, you know.

DJ: Yes, I saw that one. Shade asked you to skip the chorus. Why was that?

Dark: He said the chorus takes too long. Really, I wanted to play the chorus; it sounds cool. Cool enough for me to play.

DJ: Cool enough, indeed. Um... tell me, Dark; why does the guitar say, "Dark Chao Killaz?"

Dark: Trade secret. Can't be disclosed at further moments; needs to do CTRL-ALT-DEL. 404 and all that.

DJ: Of course, of course. .............WHAT?

Dark: It won't come off. I got it from the Heroes.

DJ: It's actually a pretty good name.

Dark: I know; it's my band name.

DJ: Yeah. But, wouldn't Dark chao think you were out to kill them?

Dark: Why would they get that idea?

DJ: Your... your band name.

Dark: What's my band name got to do with it?

DJ: You said "Dark Chao Killaz" was your band name.

Dark: What? No, it's not; my band's called "Rubber Goose."

DJay takes a deep breath, and another awkward silence follows

DJ: So, are you the only one in "Rubber Goose?"

Dark: What the hell's "Rubber Goose?"

More awkward silence

DJ: Your band, is there anyone else in your band?

Dark: Yeah. Shade's on drums and backup singing; Red's on the keyboard.

DJ: And.... you're on guitar, right? And lead singer?

Dark: No, I'm on bass.

DJ: Who's on lead guitar, then?

Dark: Didn't you hear me ten seconds ago? I'm on lead.

DJ: You just said you were on bass.

Dark: See now, that's where your mistake was. I said I was "the base." As in, the base of the whole band, right?

DJ: ......okay. Final question: Do you play Guitar Hero, or Rock Band?

Dark: You kidding? Mere video gamery? A Rubber Gooseman does no mere video gamery.

DJ: Shade plays Valve games, though.

Dark: No, those aren't games. Those are his life.

DJ: So... you don't play mere video games?

Dark: Of course not. After all, gamery resorts our bodies to the darkness.

DJ: I see. Have you even TRIED one of the mentioned games?

Dark: Yeah, tried Rock Band. The guitar-playing's terrible; those sticks slip out of your hands.

REALLY awkward silence follows

DJ: Well.... thank you for your time, Dark. Everyone who's watching, make sure to watch out for Rubber Goose, and enjoy Dark's messed-up way of thinking in Dark Chao Adventures!

Fade to black; Dark is heard saying one last thing

Dark: There you go again, talking about that "Rubber Goose" thing. What the hell are you talking about?

Dark and rockumentary by DJay32